People who knows what's going on have been asking me, "Aren't you supposed to look happier?" I'd ask myself the same question too. I don't really see the glow in me which I should be having and it's.....scary enough. I'm worried that everything's going downhill again. You know, i took so long to get back up again and I can't afford to trip over.

It sucks to not know what exactly you're feeling. It's like, I can be so happy at this point of time and in the next, feel so low once again. Sentiments of today. Felt so left out but, well, let's just forget it.

As you grow older, you become more and more dubious over who to trust and who not to trust. Meeting people who have hidden motives, and having people lying to me, people betraying you, devils all dressed up in sheepskin.... It really creeps me out. I would rather go back to secondary school days when everyone treats everyone wholeheartedly. Well at least I was being treated wholeheartedly by the ones I truly cared for. Ah, those thoughts aside.

Really have no idea whether I made the right choice. Time is really an issue. I wished the weekends were way longer than the weekdays and I wished plans wouldn't clash into the weekends. I wished I wouldn't have bad news popping out in my inbox saying that there's an exercise, and thus no contact for a week. But all my wishes would just go to waste.

Thinking too much for my own good.